With only a few hours left of 2009 I am struck with reflections and realizations of the past 365 days.
2009 and was an amazing year. I learned so much about myself and gained such valuable experience that I will take with me for the rest of my life. It had its ups and downs, as all years do. But this year I experienced the highest of the highs and the lowest of the lows. Such is life....We live, we breathe, we cry, we laugh, we love, we learn, we heal, we realize....we live.
My Truths of 2009
1. I never in a million years thought I would play a stripper. I never in a million years thought that playing a stripper would change my entire opinion of myself. I grew up shy and struggled with confidence most of my childhood and well into my mid-20s. Who knew that I would come to love myself and hold myself in such high regard while playing the part of "Maddie." I love this woman with all my heart. And she is part of me now. It wasn't just onstage, no, my new-found confidence transcended into real life. I can now look at myself and acknowledge my beauty, my soul, my strength, my power. And I only ever took off two gloves.
2. Tony 'n Tina's brought me so many dear friends and so much love. I'll always look back at this period of my life fondly.
3. It is a truth that it is okay to fall crazy madly in love. It is okay to let go and trust. It is okay to let your heart run wild. It is beautiful. It is sad. It is lovely. It is okay to lose yourself for awhile. It is wonderful when you find yourself again.
4. Always remember who you are. Honor your independence and your individuality. Honor your soul.
5. Embrace your family. They are your lifelong friends.
6. Life is fleeting. Live it with zest. Realize every moment while you live it.
7. Just because things don't go exactly as planned doesn't mean you can't still enjoy for what it is.
And countless more, but I'm heading out the door now to celebrate!
Happy New Year, here's to 2010!
Love,
Katherine
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
Random Thoughts 12.25.09
MERRY WINTER HOLIDAY!
(raised jewish and disappointed we never got to experience the shock of finding out Santa was not real, my brother and sister and I used to hang socks on the fireplace mantle on Christmas eve, and my dad would put a dollar in them overnight.)
Without further ado, my most recent random thoughts.....
1. I saw a frozen almost unrecognizable dead pigeon smushed into the Bryn Mawr train tracks.
2. A few days later, I saw a fresh dead pigeon on the Bryn Mawr train tracks. I think birds should stay away from this station.
3. A few weeks ago, at a grocery store in Hoboken, NJ, my friend and I noticed a baby in a shopping cart. How odd, we thought, to leave a sleeping child in your cart while getting your produce. Funny that the shopper decided to take her purse with her, but didn't see a problem with leaving the child behind.
4. I helped a blind man get on the train when the doors were closing. This made me feel like a worthwhile human being. Then I saw a man getting beaten up on the train platform a few stops later. My thoughts on mankind were altered after that.
5. I came across a fresh $5 dollar bill at work. Loads of them, actually. And for a moment, I found this to be absolutely extraordinary. This bill was about to embark upon the world. It would leave my hands and start its journey. Where would it go? Whose hands would it touch next? Would it live in someone's pockets for weeks? Would it make a stop at a drug dealer's apartment? Would it be tooth fairy money? Would it make a trip to Hawaii or Uganda? From this point forth, that one little $5 dollar bill would be in constant circulation. And I just found it sensational for that brief moment that I was the first stop on its long journey-filled life of destinations.
6. I saw a very fat woman on the street wearing the same green jacket I own. And I became irrationally angry. The green-jacket-bitch made my coat look bad.
7. I have, for the past six months or so, wondered if the world mumbles OR if it's simply that I just can't hear. My brother found an application called Dog Whistle for his i-phone and we tested it the last time I was at home. This is by no means an accurate test, but there was a frequency that I should be able to hear until I'm FORTY that I COULDN'T HEAR AT ALL. What's up, bitches, I'm going deaf.
8. Found out my apartment used to be a meth den and the apartment next door used to be the meth lab. Exciting or what!
9. I've always wanted freckles. I'm constantly jealous of people who were blessed with freckles. I think they are joyful. I would name them.
10. There is some debate on whether or not Lupe would be a good name for a spider. I think if I were to have a pet spider, its name would definitely be Lupe. I say Lupe is a woman's name, though there is also some debate on whether or not Lupe is a man's name or a woman's.
(raised jewish and disappointed we never got to experience the shock of finding out Santa was not real, my brother and sister and I used to hang socks on the fireplace mantle on Christmas eve, and my dad would put a dollar in them overnight.)
Without further ado, my most recent random thoughts.....
1. I saw a frozen almost unrecognizable dead pigeon smushed into the Bryn Mawr train tracks.
2. A few days later, I saw a fresh dead pigeon on the Bryn Mawr train tracks. I think birds should stay away from this station.
3. A few weeks ago, at a grocery store in Hoboken, NJ, my friend and I noticed a baby in a shopping cart. How odd, we thought, to leave a sleeping child in your cart while getting your produce. Funny that the shopper decided to take her purse with her, but didn't see a problem with leaving the child behind.
4. I helped a blind man get on the train when the doors were closing. This made me feel like a worthwhile human being. Then I saw a man getting beaten up on the train platform a few stops later. My thoughts on mankind were altered after that.
5. I came across a fresh $5 dollar bill at work. Loads of them, actually. And for a moment, I found this to be absolutely extraordinary. This bill was about to embark upon the world. It would leave my hands and start its journey. Where would it go? Whose hands would it touch next? Would it live in someone's pockets for weeks? Would it make a stop at a drug dealer's apartment? Would it be tooth fairy money? Would it make a trip to Hawaii or Uganda? From this point forth, that one little $5 dollar bill would be in constant circulation. And I just found it sensational for that brief moment that I was the first stop on its long journey-filled life of destinations.
6. I saw a very fat woman on the street wearing the same green jacket I own. And I became irrationally angry. The green-jacket-bitch made my coat look bad.
7. I have, for the past six months or so, wondered if the world mumbles OR if it's simply that I just can't hear. My brother found an application called Dog Whistle for his i-phone and we tested it the last time I was at home. This is by no means an accurate test, but there was a frequency that I should be able to hear until I'm FORTY that I COULDN'T HEAR AT ALL. What's up, bitches, I'm going deaf.
8. Found out my apartment used to be a meth den and the apartment next door used to be the meth lab. Exciting or what!
9. I've always wanted freckles. I'm constantly jealous of people who were blessed with freckles. I think they are joyful. I would name them.
10. There is some debate on whether or not Lupe would be a good name for a spider. I think if I were to have a pet spider, its name would definitely be Lupe. I say Lupe is a woman's name, though there is also some debate on whether or not Lupe is a man's name or a woman's.
Monday, December 14, 2009
The Umbrella
My umbrella is more than meets the eye.
Much like a transformer, it reached new heights on Sunday when I realized, or rather, when I was SHOWN, that not only does it pop open by clicking the button on the handle....it also pops CLOSED when clicking same said button, as well!
Imagine that.
For months--no wait, let's be real here here, we're all adults--for almost a YEAR, I have played its sweet foolish game and man-handled it closed. I bet it liked it. I have frustratingly but lovingly worked the base and the handle and pushed it down somewhat forcefully into a compact tight little unit of automatic-spring-activated-umbrella-goodness.
Umbrella knew I didn't have to do that.
But it let me go on thinking that's all it needed.
It knew all along that ONE click could eliminate all of that.
"ONE CLICK could close me forever!" it laughed silently.
One might think I am angered and/or humiliated by this discovery.
Quite the opposite.
I am humbled.
I hit the button on the handle of Umbrella and it snapped shut fantastically before my very eyes in one magical transforming moment. My face lit up and my eyes grew round like the moon. A peel of giggles escaped from me and ran down the street like a child.
Umbrella had waited patiently, mocked and yet enjoyed my man-handling, but ultimately knew that with time, I would learn how to press its buttons.
I will do so for now on.
I will press Umbrella's buttons.
But I'll still push that bitch closed if she flips inside-out on me in the middle of rain storm.
Gladly.
Much like a transformer, it reached new heights on Sunday when I realized, or rather, when I was SHOWN, that not only does it pop open by clicking the button on the handle....it also pops CLOSED when clicking same said button, as well!
Imagine that.
For months--no wait, let's be real here here, we're all adults--for almost a YEAR, I have played its sweet foolish game and man-handled it closed. I bet it liked it. I have frustratingly but lovingly worked the base and the handle and pushed it down somewhat forcefully into a compact tight little unit of automatic-spring-activated-umbrella-goodness.
Umbrella knew I didn't have to do that.
But it let me go on thinking that's all it needed.
It knew all along that ONE click could eliminate all of that.
"ONE CLICK could close me forever!" it laughed silently.
One might think I am angered and/or humiliated by this discovery.
Quite the opposite.
I am humbled.
I hit the button on the handle of Umbrella and it snapped shut fantastically before my very eyes in one magical transforming moment. My face lit up and my eyes grew round like the moon. A peel of giggles escaped from me and ran down the street like a child.
Umbrella had waited patiently, mocked and yet enjoyed my man-handling, but ultimately knew that with time, I would learn how to press its buttons.
I will do so for now on.
I will press Umbrella's buttons.
But I'll still push that bitch closed if she flips inside-out on me in the middle of rain storm.
Gladly.
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