The Umbrella

My umbrella is more than meets the eye.

Much like a transformer, it reached new heights on Sunday when I realized, or rather, when I was SHOWN, that not only does it pop open by clicking the button on the handle....it also pops CLOSED when clicking same said button, as well!

Imagine that.

For months--no wait, let's be real here here, we're all adults--for almost a YEAR, I have played its sweet foolish game and man-handled it closed. I bet it liked it. I have frustratingly but lovingly worked the base and the handle and pushed it down somewhat forcefully into a compact tight little unit of automatic-spring-activated-umbrella-goodness.

Umbrella knew I didn't have to do that.

But it let me go on thinking that's all it needed.

It knew all along that ONE click could eliminate all of that.

"ONE CLICK could close me forever!" it laughed silently.

One might think I am angered and/or humiliated by this discovery.

Quite the opposite.

I am humbled.

I hit the button on the handle of Umbrella and it snapped shut fantastically before my very eyes in one magical transforming moment. My face lit up and my eyes grew round like the moon. A peel of giggles escaped from me and ran down the street like a child.

Umbrella had waited patiently, mocked and yet enjoyed my man-handling, but ultimately knew that with time, I would learn how to press its buttons.

I will do so for now on.

I will press Umbrella's buttons.

But I'll still push that bitch closed if she flips inside-out on me in the middle of rain storm.

Gladly.